“ Don't cook. Don't clean. No man will ever make love to a woman because she waxed the linoleum – My God, the floor's immaculate. Lie down, you hot bitch." So said the walking corpse cosmetic surgery queen, Joan Rivers!
1.Work like a demon and go out like a diva. In fact, spend as little time in the house as possible then you won’t actually notice that it needs cleaning.
2. My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance.
3. There may be dust in my house but there isn't any on me!
4. Housework is something you do that nobody notices until you don't do it.
And kids mess it up in the blink of an eye anyway.
5.We’re all gonna wind up as dust – so just live with it.
6. Chore rhymes with bore – enough said!
7. Get someone else to do it…blackmail the kids (works every time –
though you won’t get a quality job unless you stand over them).
8. Get a cleaner if you can find one that doesn’t spend time on your phone,
trying on your clothes, spritzing your perfume or having fag breaks every 20 mins!
9. Don’t invite people round then you won’t so feel bad about being a failed domestic goddess.
10. Put out a fatwah on Anthea Turner for that god-awful programme
The Perfect Housewife! Yeah right, like anyone really believes she does it all herself!
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