I love creating characters in my head. I get a kick from creating the layers of their personalities like onion-skins and occasionally playing them out - or having someone else (usually my boyfriend) play their part. One of my oldest creations is Fonty - a dissolute country landowner with dubious morals and a penchant for port. Fonty, you understand, is part of the hunting, shooting, fishing brigade. He’s a larger than life, thigh-slapping philanderer with a huge stomach and a big country pile. He lives off the land, abuses the peasants and likes nothing better than holding court with his lackies and guffawing whilst telling tall tales of kills and conquests down the local. You get my drift…
Well on Saturday, I met the real life Fonty. There we were quaffing in a gorgeous pub in middle England, when in walks a clutch of the landed gentry, tweeded up and plus 4’d to the knee in shooting gear. True to form they were loud, swilled with alcohol and fresh from the kill. And holding court no less, was the real life manifestation of my character. After about half an hour of loud haw-hawing, backslapping and general falling about – Fonty, AKA Brian, decided to stagger over and try his boozy charms on me – irrespective of whether I was with someone or not…It was hilarious – he had a face like braised beetroot in aspic, a stomach that’d seen too many pork pies and hands that could easily dig a moat. And here I was face to face with Brian, AKA Fonty, up close and way, way too personal!
Wonder if I’ll meet his equally characterful and quirky French wife - Fifi now?!
